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5 Reasons You Should Never Sneak Alcohol on a Cruise

Sneaking alcohol on a cruise has always been a popular pastime for those who are willing to break the rules to avoid paying for drinks onboard. Mainstream cruise lines prohibit passengers from bringing their own liquor, beer and other alcohol (with the exception of wine or Champagne) on ships. Why spend more money than you have to, when you can try to pull a fast one on security staff?

Many “rum runner” passengers have sneaking alcohol on a cruise down to a science, stuffing refilled mouthwash bottles and purpose-made plastic bags in their checked luggage. Some even go as far as appointing the least guilty-looking family member to do the dirty work. Grandma doesn’t deserve this.

As stealthy as these rule-breakers think they are, cruise lines know all about alcohol-packing hacks. They know all the common hiding places, as well as which containers are most suspicious.

While the worst that likely will happen is a trip to the naughty room and having your prized bottle of Caribbean rum confiscated, we can think of five reasons why you shouldn’t sneak alcohol on a cruise. Don’t worry, rule-breakers: You can still enjoy a carefree vacation by cutting in line at the buffet and hogging as many deck chairs as your heart desires.

1. It’s embarrassing.

Remember how it felt to be called down to the principal’s office in grade school? Getting caught sneaking alcohol on a cruise is twice as embarrassing. Cruise lines will usually slip a note in your suitcase before it’s delivered to your cabin on embarkation day, letting you know if something was confiscated. If your bag is locked, and they suspect you might have some inside, you’ll be summoned to the naughty room to open it. Talk about feeling like a misbehaved child.

2. You’ll get the stink eye from other passengers.

Cruisers bold enough to try sneaking alcohol in their carry-on bag will not only have to suffer through public humiliation, but also reproach from passengers who are stuck in line behind them. Waiting in line is bad enough; the last thing anyone wants is to put their vacation on hold because someone else didn’t follow the rules. Even though you might be sailing with thousands of other passengers, somehow the people you annoyed at security will be the ones you run into over and over onboard.

3. You could end up losing money.

If you dropped $10 to $30 on purpose-made containers to sneak alcohol on a cruise, you’ll lose all that money — plus whatever you spent on the booze inside — when you get caught. If you opt to hide bottles in your suitcase instead, whether or not you’ll see those bottles again depends on the cruise line. Some might confiscate it indefinitely, while others will hold on to it until the end of the cruise. As you’re likely going to pay for drinks once your stash is gone, you’ll end up spending more money after a failed smuggling attempt.

4. You’re under 21.

Generally speaking, 21 is the minimum drinking age on any cruise that begins in a U.S. home port. Underage passengers who try to sneak alcohol onboard face the same repercussions as anyone else; the booze will get confiscated. The only difference is they won’t get it back at the end of the cruise. If you do make it through, you put yourself at a high risk for hurting yourself or others (for example, with alcohol poisoning, falls and sexual assault). Cruise lines reserve the right to disembark passengers who violate their alcohol policies, so obey the rules and avoid sticky situations. Age limits are in place for a reason.

5. You can bring wine or Champagne instead.

Most cruise lines let you to bring at least one bottle (typically 750ml) of wine or Champagne onboard. (Some even allow bottled water, cans of soda and juice, no questions asked.) Although corkage fees might apply if you decide to drink your own bottle in the main dining room or a specialty restaurant, you can save money by enjoying the wine in your cabin. If you do bring your wine to dinner, the corkage fee is often around $15, cheaper than purchasing a bottle or several wines by the glass. You also get to enjoy whatever red, white or rose you please.

Top 10 Things to Do on Sea Days

Top-10-Things-to-Do-on-Sea-Days-1When it comes to sea days, you either love ’em or hate ’em. What else can you do, apart from throwing your vacation dollars into a slot machine or onto a card table?

It is great news that cruise lines are increasing the number of sea day activities available to guests. Want to start prepping for your sea day fun in advance? Here are our picks for the top 10 things to do on sea days.

1. Hang out by the pools

What’s the quintessential activity onboard a cruise ship in the Caribbean? Sunbathing, of course!

While every major cruise ship has the requisite pool, hot tub and rows of lounge chairs, some take pool time to new heights. Royal Caribbean’s Freedom-, Oasis- and Quantum-class ships sport surf pools, interactive water parks for kids and zero-entry pools for wading. Disney Dream’s pool deck — with special pools for adults and little kids — is circled by a water coaster ride. Carnival and Norwegian compete on the water slide front, while Celebrity’s Solstice-class ships go a more Zen route with beautiful adults-only solariums that offer lap pools and retractable roofs.

2. Work out

When the closest you come to getting exercise during the workweek is speed-walking from your desk to the printer or running for the bus, time to work out in a state-of-the-art gym can be one of the many perks of vacation. Royal Caribbean’s Quantum-class and Freedom-class ships have huge fitness centers with boxing rings and Pilates reformer machines, while Seabourn’s Odyssey-class ships have Kinesis walls to improve flexibility and muscle tone. While most onboard fitness centers are located top-of-ship with sea views through floor-to-ceiling windows, Carnival takes workouts alfresco in its SportSquare. Beyond the gym, Crystal offers special Walking on Water (WOW) vests and LEKI walking poles for power strolls, Princess features swim-against-the-current pools and Royal Caribbean and Norwegian boast rock climbing walls.

3. Find your bliss

On the other hand, maybe you planned to indulge in a little pampering during your time off. The majority of cruise line spas are operated by Steiner Leisure, so the offerings are the same across the board. But beyond the massages, facials and mani-pedis, passengers can book Botox injections and teeth-whitening treatments, fancy shaves for men, special teen treatments, couple’s mud baths and a variety of gooey wraps that claim to do wonders for your skin, circulation and general well-being. Some of the best spas go beyond the treatment rooms. Many, like the spas on Norwegian and Celebrity ships, have thermal suites with saunas, steam rooms and heated relaxation chairs. Oceania, Carnival, Costa and Cunard offer thalassotherapy pools for therapeutic dips. For the ultimate splurge, book a spa villa on Seabourn’s and Disney’s ships for your own personal spa retreat with ocean views.

4. Eat, drink and be merry

Courtesy of NCL.com
Courtesy of NCL.com

Eating and drinking make up a large fraction of time spent onboard. Perhaps you’re fond of the smorgasbord approach, picking this and that from the Mongolian Wok, Tandoor Indian food, New York-style deli or the pizza, pasta, and burrito bars on Carnival. Or maybe you like a leisurely sea day lunch at upscale Holland America’s Pinnacle Grill or a Champagne brunch at Disney’s adults-only Palo. Those predisposed to a liquid diet can kick back with buckets of beer and fruity cocktails from poolside bars, glasses of wine with lunch or even milkshakes on Oceania and fruit smoothies on Royal Caribbean.

5. Learn something

Toss the trashy novel, and make your brain do a bit of work on your cruise. And we’re not talking about the fierce team trivia competitions for bragging rights to a logo cap or bag. Learn a new language on Crystal or Celebrity, learn to cook in the show kitchens of Holland America and Oceania, make scrapbooks on Celebrity or participate in a Discovery at Sea scavenger hunt on Princess. Several lines offer computer and digital photography classes, so you can come home with the most sophisticated vacation photo presentations ever.

6. Get silly

It’s perfectly acceptable to drop your workweek formality and get a little silly on a cruise. Some might say that you’re missing out on the true cruise experience if you don’t get off your high horse and get into the onboard fun and games. Carnival has perfected the art of pool games with events like the Hairy Chest Competition, Rubber Chicken Olympics and Battle of the Sexes. Royal Caribbean is known for impromptu dance parties on the Royal Promenade, while Disney enlists its famous characters to round everyone up for fun. Join in the life-size renditions of popular board games on Carnival’s Hasbro, The Game Show. It’s OK to show off your rusty dance moves or cheer loudly for your favorite — you will very likely never see any of your shipmates again.

7. Be entertained

Matinee performance, anyone?

Courtesy of NCL.com
Courtesy of NCL.com

While mainstream ships always have some sort of evening performance scheduled, some entertainment-focused lines keep their theaters full on sea day afternoons. Royal Caribbean tops the leaderboard on this one with matinees of its ice skating and Aquatheater shows, as well as midday showings of its Broadway shows, like “Hairspray.” It’s also known for afternoon parades through its ships’ Promenades, complete with Dreamworks characters and colorful costumes. Norwegian Getaway and Escape get loose with “Wine Lovers The Musical,” a daytime wine-tasting comedy show experience.

8. Go to camp

If you’re a kid, that is. Knowing that the under-18 set doesn’t want to play bingo with mom and dad all day, cruise lines have built elaborate kids’ recreation areas that will have adults

Courtesy of NCL.com
Courtesy of NCL.com

wishing they could turn back time and join in the fun. Think mocktail bars for sodas and smoothies, Internet and video game consoles, piles of board games and toys and some hands-on crafts projects — plus shipwide scavenger hunts, pizza parties and karaoke contests. Disney leads the pack with playrooms straight out of its hit movies, like Toy Story and Monsters Inc., and cutting-edge, computer-generated, interactive game floors inspired by brands like Marvel and Star Wars. Royal Caribbean reaches out to the youngest cruisers with a Royal Babies and Tots Nursery, providing age-appropriate activities for interactive play sessions, as well as care for kids as young as six months to three years. Trained counselors wrangle the little tykes and keep an eye on teens, so kids and adults can pursue their favorite activities in harmony.

9. Seek out thrills

Courtesy of Carnival.com
Courtesy of Carnival.com

Move over, chair hogs. A new breed of cruiser has abandoned poolside vegging for high-octane pursuits onboard. They’re skydiving on Royal Caribbean’s Quantum-class ships and ziplining several decks above sea level on its Oasis Class. They’re dangling from great heights on Norwegian Escape’s largest ropes course at sea. And, to cool off after all that exertion, they speed down any number of onboard water slides … again and again and again.

10. Retreat from the world

You’re on vacation, and a little peace and quiet would be nice. Unfortunately, your 3,000-plus shipmates might have other ideas, making a ruckus on the lido deck while poolside movie screens blare rock concerts. You could retreat to your cabin… or seek solace on a serenity

Courtesy of Carnival.com
Courtesy of Carnival.com

deck. Princess pioneered the concept with its adults-only Sanctuary sun decks, where you can buy a day pass to plush lounge chairs, alfresco massages, Evian misters and even MP3 players loaded with New Age selections. Lines from Holland America and Oceania to Carnival and Norwegian rent out private cabanas, where you can draw the curtains on the world as you savor fruit skewers and chilled towels. If nothing else, look for adults-only sun decks to avoid the little splashers who often take over the main pools.